8 ways to give a shit (rated PG-13)

I've been bombarded by shit lately! In my email, on facebook, and on tv, I have heard some new and funny ways to use the word "Shit". COmbined with some old favorites, here are 8 ways you can use "shit" to add some pizzazz to your conversations. (unless you are a seventh grader.)

* Shit on a shingle- It's what's for dinner. In my mother's family, this was creamed tuna on toast, but I think more traditionally, it's creamed beef on toast. My grandmother probably made it on Fridays. So appetizing!

* Shit sandwich- Not nearly as enticing as the above S.O.S., a shit sandwich is the lesser of two evils. "I'd rather eat a shit sandwich than listen to Dick Cheney explain how the Vice President of the United States is not part of the executive branch"

* Shitpile- a unit of measurement, ususally used for solid items: I have a shitpile of laundry to do.

* Shitload- larger than a shitpile. I think you could fit two or three shitpiles into a shitload. One would be better off taking a shitload of laundry to the laundromat and getting it all done in one day.

* Shithead- We all know shitheads, sometimes we all act like shitheads, but nothing is as funny as picturing a shithead.

* Shitfaced- I don't know the origins of this cute colloquialism, but I surely have been shitfaced a time or two. I think shitfaced is when you promise God you will never drink again if only he would help you vomit.

* Shit storm- A person who surrounds herself with a lot of drama might be said to be in the midst of a shit storm of emotion.

And, finally, my favorite:

* Shit show- An ugly display, poor behavior, a spectacle. You might be treated to a shit show in the bleachers at a Little League game.